I Had A Revelation


Who knows what a little
A little love can change?
I know just a little
A little love will change you


Meet me in the middle
In the middle we can meet again
If we meet in the middle
I know you’ll love me til the end

~Josh Farro, Paramore

You know those times in your life when you are going through a bunch of crap and you can’t really figure out why you feel the way you do?  Then out of nowhere, Poof! You figure it out. I call this a revelation. They don’t happen very often, but when they do, it’s awesome! I had one last night, and now I don’t know if I feel better or worse.

I have been having so much fun dating, just having a blast, no strings attached.  Being my own person and meeting some great people, but since I fell into “like” with Mr. Dammit, (See my post, Dammit), things have been weird.  I am no longer satisfied with just dating, I need more and I didn’t understand why this came out of nowhere.  Now I do… I don’t need a relationship, I need intimacy. Or maybe both, I don’t know.

I learned very quickly after my divorce 10 years ago that sex and intimacy do not always go together.  I understand, that for some people they have to, but for me, nope. They are two very, very different things, and I can easily have one without the other.  I have been living in blissful ignorance of how important intimacy is to me and now that I know, I can’t get it out of my head.

I need touch: holding hands in the car, cuddling on the couch watching a movie, or laying in bed, legs tangled together just talking about random things.

Forehead Kisses. (So important it gets its own line).

I will say it again, forehead kisses.

I need someone who plays with my hair absentmindedly, texts me just to tell me they are thinking of me, and NOT how excited they are to have sex with me.  See the difference?

My last boyfriend spoiled me.  Not with things, but with love and feelings and touch.  He always told me to wear my seat belt (something I never do, bad I know).  He wasn’t telling me what to do, but expressing that he cared for my safety, so I did.  He could talk me out of bed on bad days, which is not an easy task. At restaurants we would hold hands across the table, we were almost always touching in someway.  I miss that.

I know that everyone is different, but intimacy is intimacy.  I was doing just fine until Mr. Dammit. With him, I had intimacy.  I don’t know how, time was so limited, but it was there nonetheless, and now I remember what it feels like and I am craving it again.


“It is not time or opportunity that is to determine intimacy;—it is disposition alone. Seven years would be insufficient to make some people acquainted with each other, and seven days are more than enough for others.”


~Jane Austen, Sense and Sensibility

So now that I have this information, I need to figure out what I am going to do with it.  My first impulse was to stop talking to everyone I have been hanging out with, but that seemed rash, so I didn’t do that.  I really need to take inventory (silly word, I know) and see if there is potential there, and if not, move on.. Sounds harsh, but in the end it is about me, and what makes me happy.  If I don’t make changes, then I will live in the same unhappy place forever.

Wish me luck!

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Tattooed Girls


“My body is my journal, and my tattoos are my story.”


~Johnny Depp

Recently, I got tattoos on the fingers of my right hand.  One is a pentacle and the other is a quarter moon. I posted the pic on a witchcraft group I was in and it was overwhelmed with likes.  (I love when that happens!) Anyway, one woman commented asking if they were drawn on or if it was a tattoo. I should mention that she is in an older generation than myself.  Once I told her that it was a tattoo she got so excited. She explained in her day it was unacceptable for women to get tattoos, never mind ones on their fingers.

I want to be clear here, I am not a feminist, (I know, haters gonna hate), but I do believe in equal rights.  There is no reason that tattoos should be acceptable on men and not on woman. That is just crazy talk.  I consider myself lucky to be living in a generation where this is mostly not the case.

So, in case you haven’t figured it out yet,  I am a tattooed girl. I have gotten more expressive with them over the past year or so. They are becoming more visible, a big step in the workforce, but the world is becoming more accepting of tattoos at a rapid rate.  

I love every single one of my tattoos and each one has a special meaning just for me. I am not really one of those girls to pick a tattoo out of a book. I like to bring the artist an idea and let them run with it. They are the artist afterall, they know better than me.

I am one that finds a tattoo artist via word of mouth. (Is there really any other way?) I will stay with them for awhile, then someone else with give me a recommendation and I will see that person for awhile.  This time, my friend Robbie (Check out his blog! My Weak Started on Sadder Days), sent me to his friend and awesome tattoo artist TJ at Null Tattoo.  He is amazing!  I give him an idea and he perfectly matches what is in my head.  Check him out on Facebook & Instagram.  I highly recommend him.  (He even lets me listen to Ed Sheeran!)

Leave your tattoo pics in the comments!!

Three Tattoos by TJ @ Null Tattoo